Reality check. My two boys are, without a doubt, two of the very best things in my life. They make me smile, make me proud, make me happy… but truth be told- often make me behave in a way I know I would not want taped by hidden camera! My older guy, Ryan is 13- Liam is 5. I have a secret fear that I am the “old looking mom” to Liam’s class… maybe that’s why I tend to hang more with the 8th grade moms at school functions… but that little fountain of youth got cut off the other day during the following dialog. Ryan has a junior high dance at school coming up. We were in the car, and I asked if he wanted to get anything new to wear. As a teen- I remember a dance was a mandatory trip to the mall- but they weren’t malls then- just stores. They hadn’t learned to travel on packs yet.
Turns out, teen age boys feel its fine to pull something off the floor, and if it passes the “whiff test” (smelling it when your mother’s back is turned to see if it is clean) and call it a day. No surprise- Ryan said he was fine- a little bit of silence, then I asked….
“um…is there anyone you’re going with?”
“yeah Mom, the whole 7th and 8th grades are going” (followed by the all too common eye roll)
“No kiddo- I mean- going with?”
He looked at me like I was speaking in tongues
“Is there a girl you want to ask? maybe go out for ice cream afterwards?”
” NO MOM! We don’t do that- This isn’t the 80’s!”
He proceeds to crack up. Partly at the look of horror on my face and my dropped jaw. Partly in pride of his new found “wise guy” skills that emerged the day he turned 13. His little brother then follows in laughter…. I flip on the radio to drown them out and it is tuned to the oldies station. Madonna is on. Like a Prayer. *sigh* Madonna is on the oldies station. Yep. There’s no fighting it. I’m just going to have to do like Frankie says, and “Relax”. I crank it up- roll down the windows and sing along REAL loud. They are mortified.
Revenge is sweet.